An upset mom-to-be explained how she felt betrayed after her husband chose their firstborn’s name with his family behind her back.
The young woman in question revealed she met her husband while studying abroad which is why she never really got to bond with his family until they visited them after they were already married.
She also said she just found out she was pregnant when they moved to his home because he missed his family.
“Shortly after his announcement of our pregnancy, I was informed of this family tradition that all of the children are named by his Great Great? Grandma. And I wasn’t informed of this until after she had chosen the name,” the woman wrote in her Reddit post.
“It was a family gathering that happen fairly regularly, Grandma is ancient, I have no idea how old she is or if she is even really cognizant, her bed is in the main room of the house and gatherings always involve her but she usually doesn’t seem overly present.”
The mom-to-be continued: “They brought me to her bed and placed her hand on my belly and said the ‘name.’ (I’m not sure about saying specifics but it is not something I would not think of as a name like Jam, Mayonnaise, Marmalade). My mother-in-law then said ‘Baby Name’ and the rest of my husband’s family also referred to the baby as this as though it’s decided, but I didn’t agree to this and acted with revulsion when my husband explained it to me.”
After the incident, the woman confronted her husband who insisted that they follow his “family tradition” to avoid “disrespecting” his great-grandmother.
“When I try to discuss it or explain my discomfort over the name to his family they say I’m disrespecting them and trying to break their traditions. I’m worried about how such a name will impact my baby in the future. So would I be the a**hole for refusing to name my baby following the tradition?” the disgruntled wife concluded.
After asking Reddit for advice, the woman was urged to evaluate her options and “fight tradition with tradition.”
“Fight tradition with tradition.point 245 |
It’s my family’s tradition to let the parents decide on their child’s name without input from other members of the family.point 108 | You know, to stop jealousy between the maternal and paternal family as great Uncle Edgar would also like a go.point 199 | So to avoid conflict as my family feels very strongly about this, I must decline,” one of the top comments read.point 293 | 1
Another reader said: “Did you ever one time fully tell them you agree to this? Regardless you’re right that the kid will have to live with the name and so will you. If you think it could adversely impact them, you absolutely should start growing that shiny spine right now and refuse. Though yeah the chances of his side of the family using it as a nickname are probably very real, whether you agree to it or not.”
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