Nobody wants to punish children, but there are times when it is necessary.
However, punishing them more than they deserve can result in negative consequences. It damages their self-esteem and they develop fears that make simple things harder for them.
Experts recommend these effective ways to punish a child, helping parents deal with such situations.
#1 Punishment shouldn’t be emotional
Many parents get really angry when their children because they have huge expectations for them. When these expectations are not met, such strong emotions should be suppressed. Children might have problems in the future due to all the screaming.
#2 Never punish a child in public
Punishing children in public makes them angry and embarrassed.point 191 | Experts do not recommend using phrases like ‘what will other people say?’ A child who often experiences public punishment feels humiliated and may expect such situation to repeat.point 347 |
When they become adults, they can turn into someone who always relies on the opinion of the majority.point 84 | 1
#3 Don’t use offensive words
When people are too emotional, they don’t notice that they use offensive words. Sensitive children may have problems with low self-esteem and they may remember the times when their father or mother used a bad word. It is important to be careful with words and use only a neutral vocabulary.
#4 When unsure who is guilty, punish everyone
If you are not sure which child is guilty, punish all of them. Because if you don’t, the child you punished will be damaged. When your child is with a friend, do not criticize other children at all.
#5 A child shouldn’t be punished if they didn’t have bad intentions
Most of the time, children just want to discover things. This is a part of their learning process and they should be supported. If their actions led to something bad, sympathize with them and teach them how to fix the situation.
#6 If you threatened to punish, do it
A threat that is only promised is worse than no punishment at all. Children are smart to realize that parents only say words and they eventually stop trusting them. Thus, their system of values becomes damaged as they can’t differentiate the good from the bad.
#7 Orders and suggestions are different things
If a child is sensitive and they get punished for going against your suggestion, it can hurt them. In their adult life, it could make them want to follow other people’s orders because they are scared of negative consequences.
What do you think about these methods? Do you know other effective ways to punish a child without damaging their self-esteem? Let us know in the comments section!